Ape over apes

My buddy Joe has an ape obsession. Planet Of The Apes and King Kong are two of his most favorite movies of all time. He's been made up several times by professional make-up artists to look like several ape characters from the Planet Of The Apes movies - General Urko, Dr Zaius, and of course Cornelius. He's been known to throw on a gorilla costume for almost any event much to the horror and/or delight of his attending audience. On the surface one might guess that his love for apes originates from the alluring and almost magical processes from which they've been brought to his attention - the pre-CGI make-up effects of John Chambers (Planet Of The Apes, 1968) or over 30 years prior to that - the stop motion animation of Willis O'Brien which brought a fur and rubber Kong to life in 1933. Two creative methods which have also become favorite pastimes for Joe.

But I see another, more cerebral layer to his anthropoid primate affections... these apes of fantasy, whether as wild as Kong or evolved as Cornelius, sport a truer, more profound core than man. Kong was better off left on Skull Island, where for no logical reason I could think of he lived amongst creatures thought long extinct. He had to contend with the likes of Tyrannosaurus, a cave serpent and a pit spider (in a scene cut from the film and never found to this day) - but they were no match to the fighter pilots who took Kong down from atop the Empire State Building at the film's end. Kong was thought a monster, and yet he gave his life trying to protect the beautiful Fay Wray, who fit in the palm of his hand. By the closing credits, one would assume, there was not a dry eye in the house.

The apes in Planet Of The Apes are perhaps a much more headier conundrum. Joe would need to explain this to me - although I have seen the movie several times. While all along we are believed to be descendants of apes (putting aside, of course, the religious Adam & Eve explanation) - it is the film's surprise ending which suggests we've somehow gone as extinct as our cave dweller ancestors - and somehow apes rule the world. Although some of the apes in the original movie appeared outright horrifying to me, it was the portrayal of the two kindly husband and wife simian scientists (Cornelius and Zera) who showed the most compassion. Once again, it was man - not ape - who managed to screw things up. Astronaut Taylor finds out at the films end, that he's been on this strange planet before.

Perhaps Joe knows that somewhere behind an apes eyes lies more truth than man will ever know. Embedded in our DNA and theirs the answers lie mostly undiscovered. One day, perhaps over a hot cup of java in some late night diner, Joe and I will once again discuss these things. I need to know in that one instance when he visited the Chimpanzee cage at the Central Park Zoo - if he got any closer to the truth as he ran scrambling from the hurled feces.

"Poo Fling" cartoon courtesy of Mark DeGross

Out Of Bodies' Strange but True! Stories of the bizarre, super natural, and vividly imagined!

 

 

To kick off this new addition to the OOB site here are a few stories culled from Joe's Facebook page. They're short little blurbs, not really stories - but some of these will definitely raise the hairs up on the back of your neck! Not all of the Out Of Bodies stories that we'll be featuring are scary - fact some are downright hilarious - and we'll be posting more of them as we go along. Very often one story reminds one of us of yet another one! You know how it is - kind of like we're all gathered around a campfire! So be prepared to be thoroughly entertained - or perhaps confused...

SCARY BUT TRUE STORY #3.....Dan Banic and I were para-normal investigators for a spell in the early 90s...one night we get a call...my neighbor is watching bottles of 7-up and Coke UNSCREWING themselves in her fridge and popping open...I VIDEOTAPED IT!!!!! Now you know why we need para-normal psycho therapy.

SCARY BUT TRUE STORY # 4....another neighbor told us that every night before she goes to bed, a little man can be seen sitting on her bedpost smiling at her. She said it was a little rabbi with a long beard...that's how she described him.
We never saw it even with a video camera left there all night{the woman was 70 ok} but tape recordings documented voices and the pitter-patter of little feet.

SCARY BUT TRUE STORY # 6...Dan Banic and i watch a meteor shoot RIGHT OVER OUR HEADS one sweltering summer night at 3am at my house....THEN we saw lit up in the night sky a huge devil-like face the size of a battleship, just watching us.

SCARY BUT TRUE STORY #9....1973...My aunt telephones my Mom in terror at 10:00pm...she just watched a man who looked like Jesus Christ walk right through her kitchen wall and reappear in the next room..smiling at her before vaporizing into thin air. On her death bed, she swore it was true and told us that now she would be going to find out...

SCARY BUT TRUE STORY #13...Dan Banic and I witness the "little elephant".
We were driving Dan home one late, late night in the Bronx..passing below the Bronx River Underpass when we saw a brightly lit, a small baby elephant...glowing.
When we turned round to backtrack and to take a photo, it was gone...

SCARY BUT TRUE STORY #12....I was one of 4 friends who saw something that to this day haunts my dreams and will always be the most incredible thing I've ever seen, if it's true... While returning from the funeral mass of our good friend Anna {she got hit by a bus on a street near my house and the accident scene was too much for anyone to take}...we went back to her Mom's house to help sort through stuff and to lock up and suddenly Anna comes walking down the stairs and tells us she is fine and we are all blessed. SCREAMING HORRORS!!!!! WE ALL SAW IT AND BROKE THE SCREEN DOOR DOWN TRYING TO ALL GET OUT OF THAT ROOM. I WILL NEVER FORGET IT ..AND TWO OF US STILL TALK ABOUT IT TO THIS DAY!!!!

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